Wednesday, November 23, 2005


Nobody else compares to my husband. He is intelligent, articulate, artist and a true original. We are the perfect pair. His art, my technology. His vision with my abilities, nothing is impossible. Together we have survived, accomplished more in such a short time, than many in a lifetime.

I am and will always be grateful for the bond that we share, but in times of separation it makes it all that much harder.

At times, it makes me almost envious of those that don't share the bond we do. They don't miss their spouse nearly as much, other actually enjoy it.

I feel at times as if I am going through a slow torture. Not just for my loneliness, but also what he is going through. Not alone is he away from home with a group of people who just met a few months ago, that he has close to nothing in common with. Not only is he lost his freedom and privacy. Not only does he have to spend 12 hours of each day on patrol in a foreign land, with a walkie talkie attached to be called to the trouble if and when it comes. As if all that isn't enough, he is missing our children as well as me. Not only does he feel the loss of me, but also of our 3 small girls.

I find myself crying, not always for me but also for him. Mine is a pain of the loss of him in a manner, but he has lost his entire life. Home, family, friends, career, all in one sweep. He deserves better, and it hurts me that I can't do anything to give him what he deserves.

No comments: